Breakin’ Up with ED - Katie DeVries
Breakin’ Up with ED
Dearest (NOT) ED,
You weaseled your way into my life and quickly won me over;
I lost myself in your SEDUCTIVE BEAUTY but missed your HIDDEN HORROR.
Our relationship started off, as healthy first indeed;
When hand-in-hand we walked, notoriety received.
With you, you had the MAGIC WAND to melt my fat away;
I didn’t realize what that meant, the price I had to pay.
At first you showed me all the good that being with you brought;
Fitness, respect, attraction, praise and then my soul was bought.
You began to INVADE my every thought and kept me FAR AWAY;
From all of those I love and adore, a LIE I must portray.
You put PANIC in my breath, and GRIEF down in my heart;
You filled my brain with your ABUSIVE thoughts, I was a puppet playing your part.
As the numbers DIPPED and DROPPED you told me I was living;
But my body and soul were WASTING AWAY from the ABUSE you had been giving.
My body started to feel SICK, my hair it THINNED right through.
I was TIRED, COLD, SHAKY, AND WEAK but you still stuck like glue.
You made me wish that I were DEAD, and that was your ultimate plan.
But MERCIFULLY I still rest in GOD’S ALMIGHTY HAND.
By the KINDNESS of some caring folks, I was led to ERC;
Where they taught me to cut you out and learn to LOVE just ME.
You still try to call and text and sometimes I let you in;
But with ERCWA’s PATIENT HELP I learned RECOVERY I can win.
I’ll DEFUSE your abusive messages and watch them float away.
I’ll sit in the discomfort--EXPANSION is the way.
I’ll CONNECT with those around me and stay PRESENTLY AWARE.
I’ll become the sky--OBSERVING SELF--you’re just a cloud out there.
I’ll set my COMMITTED ACTIONS and be SMART enough to follow;
Things that lead me to my VALUES of the new tomorrow.
In my new found WISE MIND, I’ll ACCEPT and I will CHANGE;
MINDFULLY ANCHORING on a task, one you don’t arrange.
I’m loaded down with DT skills when you flip my lid.
I’ll communicate effectively--“Ed, back down off my crib!”
And because I know you oh so well, I know you won’t give up;
So OPPOSITE ACTION I will rock and go and eat my sup--
If a text should happen to once again break through;
All I have to ask is, “What would Lora and Jacquelyn do?”
So GOOD-BYE ED, you horrible beast, NO MORE, WE'RE DONE, IT’S THROUGH!
It’s time for me to go on LIVING MY LIFE here all anew.
I’ll EAT MY FOOD and have NO FEAR because it's the HEALTHY AMOUNT.
I’ll SAVOUR EACH BITE, ENJOY THE TASTE, regardless of calorie count.
I’ll hang with FRIENDS and FAMILY and maybe go on dates.
Who knows, one day my HEART WILL FIND its one true real SOUL MATE.
MY HEART is filled with GRATITUDE to those who showed the way.
My people at home who never stopped PRAYING me through each day.
COMPASSIONATE staff at ERC who put up with all my shit;
And helped me BELIEVE I was allowed to give my BRAIN RESPITE.
The BRAVE, COURAGEOUS, INSPIRATIONAL peers who never stopped the fight;
ARMOURED UP with our SKILLS we battle to the LIGHT!
RECOVERY is a JOURNEY, one that never ends.
HOPE’S ON THE HORIZON, ON ITS PATH MY HEART WILL MEND.
This picture was taken by Katie at Maydenbower Beach in Bellevue, WA.