November 17, 2016

How to Be Authentic This Holiday Season – Robyn Cruze

autumn leaves outside“And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” – Marianne Williamson

Have you ever committed so much to being the person that you think you should be, that you forgot who you were?

I have.

With the holiday season upon us, I wonder if any of you fear showing your own truth — maybe in fear of being judged. If so, I’m hoping that my story will encourage you to grab hold of your truth and remember that you are enough, just as you are, this holiday season.

We don’t have to be anyone else, other than ourselves

A few weeks ago, I went to see the inspirational New York Times best-selling author Glennon Doyle Melton. Before I left to go to the theater, I called my sponsor, and I said, “I know that I will spend much of my time missing the inspirational message because I will be so busy comparing my insides with their outsides.”

You see, I can get this little voice inside that tells me terrible things like:

  • I am never good enough
  • I haven’t made it
  • I’m not pretty enough and I’m too old

At times, this voice is so loud that it blocks out anything else. Quite honestly, it’s frustrating that I still have to be mindful of such an icky voice.

When Glennon spoke that night, she said something really profound that hit me quite heavy. She said (and I paraphrase here) that we spend so much of our time “becoming” because when we are young we are taught that this is what we have to do.

We are told to become someone good, become something great, have something spectacular, and of course, become somebody important. So much of our early life is spent in “becoming.”

Gifting my truth

I don’t know about you, but I super-relate to this idea. I remember, when I was in my first career as an actress, I thought I had to become famous. To become famous, I thought I had to hide a lot of things — all my truth, all that made me who I was — because I was taught that the real me was just too much.

You see, I’m a very sensitive person and the messages I got in my life were that my displaying this sensitivity would make me too vulnerable to the world. And so I hid my essence; I became a persona.

Now, in my recovery, thankfully, I have been slowly finding my way back to self.

This morning, I was thinking that these same feelings often come up during the holiday season for so many of us. Many of us will feel the need to show up as someone who has improved, moved forward and become someone better.

But — I encourage you to be authentic and simply show up as yourself. Showing up as yourself is a powerful becoming message that just might inspire others to do the same.

Will you join me in being courageous and authentic, even if it feels vulnerable, this holiday season?

Robyn Cruze, MA is National Recovery Advocate and the online community manager for Eating Recovery Center.

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