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Window of Opportunity Knocks - A Poem

By Andy McLoughlin
Look at that guy in the window. He always seems so sad. Everyone says how much they love him.
 

Look at that guy in the window.
He always seems so sad
Everyone says how much they love him
But he always looks so very bad

I bet he's ungrateful or selfish
And probably thinks he's above
All of those kind souls around him
He might be unworthy of love
The guy in the window is lazy
With so many people wishing him well
he just cant seem to be bothered
Climbing out of his own personal hell
I wish I could ask him one question
A question to help him explain
Why he won't try to find shelter
From his own allegorical rain
I know everyone says he's awesome
But that's impossible for me to believe
I'm not sure I could ever trust him
Is he hiding something up his sleeve?

This guy in the window is pissing me off
He needs to make up his damn mind
Is he someone people should invest in
Or give up on, and leave behind
I don't understand his contentment
With wallowing in self pity and hate.
Maybe I should try to do something,
And help him before it's too late
I guess I can try to talk to the guy,
And at least let him know that I'm here.
I wouldn't mind getting to know him,
And show him there's nothing to fear.
Yes! I think I'll go help him.
He's just a human being like me.
If I insert myself in his moment,
Who knows what the outcome might be!?

No time to be wasted,
he has suffered enough.
*knock, knock, knock* on his window
He's still looking rough
Perhaps all is not lost,
I see hope in his eyes.
As he turns toward my knocking,
With a look of surprise.
He approaches the window,
with slight hesitation.
He seems to be wary,
of my surprise visitation.
With the window still closed
He yells through the glass
"What do you want?"
In a tone, rather crass

"Would you like to talk?"
I asked with a smile
He shakes his head "no"
After thinking a while...

"Everytime that we talk,
You just tell me I'm fat
How disgusting I am
And more things like that"

"What do you mean?!
We've never spoken before!"
I yell through the window,
...might as well be a door.
The guy winces sharply
And turns in my direction
With a look on his face
Of betrayal and affection
His face was as close
As it could possibly be,
And with just enough volume
For his words to reach me,

He said "Last time we talked"
Then he paused with a *sigh*
"You claimed I'd live alone,
And that alone I would die."

I don't remember this talk
Or speaking with such fury
"Please explain this to me!"
I requested with worry.

The guy in the window
Shook his head and closed his eyes
Then he calmly retorted
"When will you realize?"

"Realize what man!?"
I said in a yelp
"It's you, it's your window
I knocked on to help!"

"No that's not true"
Said in a much softer tone
"You think you're here to help me
But I'm actually alone"
"I do welcome your help,
You have such a large role.
In fact, You and I together
Are two halves of a whole."

"When you tapped on my window
my day got much queerer
you offered discussion
and moved yourself nearer
You thought you could help me
To see things a bit clearer
But you never realized that
My window is your mirror.

Don't be scared now,
Nothing has changed
You're not going crazy
And I'm not deranged
This first step had to be made
Before steps two and three.
Changing "I" and "you" to "we" and "us"
So that now, our "we" is "ME."

That guy in the mirror is me
Not sure how I missed it before
People outside love him
But Inside I love him more.

 

 

This poem was written by Andy, a member of the Recovery Ambassador Council at Eating Recovery Center.

 

 

 

 

eating disorder
mental health
recovery ambassador council
submitted poem
Andy McLoughlin, Recovery Ambassador Council Member
Written by

Andy McLoughlin

Andy speaks publicly to educate and destigmatize not just for BED patients but all those afflicted with an ED. He is passionate about the need for public awareness, education, and proactive treatment of eating disorders and mental illness in general. Due to having lived most his life undiagnosed, Andy feels that his struggle could have been lessened had any one of the number of professionals responsible for his childhood development been educated properly in mental illness awareness. For that reason, he is driven to push for programming to help identify such issues in children early on in life. He also supports the effort to promote acceptance that males often deal with the horror of eating disorders.

Andy's speaking topics include: Recovery from Binge Eating Disorder, the importance of diagnosis, and males and eating disorders.

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